爆笑盘点：男人来自火星，女人来自金星？ 1.Groceries 1.采购 A woman makes a list of things she needs and then goes to the store and buys these things. 女人：女人会根据需要列出购物单，去超市里买这些东西。 A man waits until the only items left in his fridge are half a lemon. Then he goes grocery shopping. He buys everything that looks good. 男人：男人会等到冰箱里只剩下半个 柠檬 。然后去超市买东西。他会把那些看着不错的东西都买下来。 2.Money 2.金钱 A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. 男人：用得着的东西，要是值1块钱却卖2块，男人也会买。 A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need, but it's on sale. 女人：用不着的东西，要是值2块钱却只卖1块，女人也会买。 3.Bathrooms 3.浴室 A man has at most 6 items in his bathroom -- a toothbrush, toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of Dial soap, and a towel from the Holiday Inn. 男人：男人的浴室里有6样东西：一把牙刷、刮胡膏、刮胡刀、一块Dial牌肥皂、一块从假日酒店里顺手牵羊的毛巾。 The average number of items in a typical woman's bathroom is 437. A man would not be able to identify most of these items. 女人：在一个典型女人的浴室，平均会有437样物品。男人认不出其中的绝大多数。 4.Dressing Up 4.穿戴整齐 A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail. 女人：女人在做以下事情时，都会穿戴整齐，买东西，浇花，倒垃圾，接电话，读书，取信。 A man will dress up for weddings and funerals. 男人穿戴整齐时，他是要去参加婚礼或者葬礼。 5.The Telephone 5.电话 Men see the telephone as a communications tool. They use the telephone to send short messages to other people. 男人：对男人来说，电话是沟通的工具。他们用电话给别人发短信。 A woman can visit her girlfriend for two weeks, and upon returning home, she will call the same friend and they will talk for three hours. 女人：女人可以在在朋友家住了两周之后，一回到家就给同一个朋友打电话，一打就是仨小时。 6.Nicknames 6.昵称 If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara. 女人：要是劳蕊，琳达，伊丽莎白和芭芭拉出去吃饭，她们互相称呼劳蕊，琳达，伊丽莎白和芭芭拉。 If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy. 男人：要是马克，克瑞斯、埃瑞克和汤姆出去吃饭，他们会互相亲密地称作胖子、恶狼、癞头和废材。 7.Maturity 7.成熟 Women mature much faster then men. Most 17-year-old females can function as adults. 女人：她们比男人成熟得早很多。大部分17岁的姑娘已经和成年女性差不多了。 Most 17-year-old males are still trading baseball cards and giving each other wedgies after gym class. This is why high school romances rarely work. 男人：大部分17岁的小伙子还热衷于交换棒球卡、在体育课之后打打闹闹。这也就是为什么高中时期的恋情很少有结果。 8.Marrige 8.婚姻 A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. 女人：女人嫁给一个男人，希望他能改变，可他变不了。 A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change! And she does. 男人：男人娶了一个女人，希望她永远不变，可她却变了。 9.Admitting Mistakes 9.承认错误 Women will sometimes admit making a mistake. 女人：女人有时会认错。 The last man who admitted he was wrong was General George Custer. 男人：上一个承认自己错了的男人要追溯到 卡斯特 将军（死于19世纪后期）。 10.Success 10.成功 A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. 男人：成功的男人是能挣比他太太花得更多的钱的。 A successful woman is one who can find such a man. 女人：成功的女人是能找得到这么个男人。 查看更多0个回答 . 5人已关注
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