经典笑话三则？ Three Classical Jokes 1. USS Enterprise This is the transcript of an ACTUAL radio conversation of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995. Radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations 10-10-95. Americans: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision. Canadians: Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision. Americans: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course. Canadians: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course. Americans: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS ENTERPRISE,THE LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES' ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH, THAT'S ONE FIVE DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTER-MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP. Canadians: This is a lighthouse. Your call. 2. Football fan A primary teacher starts a new job at a school on Mersyside and, trying to make a good impression on her first day, explains to her class that she is a Liverpool fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they, too, are Liverpool fans. Everyone in the class raises their hand except one little girl. The teacher looks at the girl with surprise and says: "Mary, why didn't you raise your hand?" "Because I'm not a Liverpool fan," she replied. The teacher, still shocked, asked: "Well if your not a Liverpool fan, then who are you a fan of?" "I'm a Manchester City fan, and proud of it," Mary replied. The teacher could not believe her ears. "Mary, why, pray tell, are you a City fan?" "Because my mum and dad are from Manchester, and my mum is a City fan and my dad is a City fan, so I'm a City fan too!" "Well," said the teacher, in a obviously annoyed tone, "that's no reason for you to be a City fan. You don't have to be just like your parents all the time. What if your mum was a prostitute and you dad was a drug dealer and car theif, what...what you be then?" "Then," Mary smiled, "I'd be a Liverpool fan." 3. The Self-assured Princess Once upon a time, in a land far away, a beautiful, independent, self-assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle. The frog hopped into the Princess' lap and said: "Elegant Lady, I was once a handsome Prince, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper, young Prince that I am and then, my sweet, we can marry and setup housekeeping in your castle with my Mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel grateful and happy doing so." That night, on a repast of lightly sauteed frogs legs seasoned in a white wine and onion cream sauce, she chuckled to herself and thought: I don't **ing think so !!!!!查看更多0个回答 . 3人已关注
哪位大师帮助翻译一下下面一段英语！？ 这是LNG 低温泵 故障排除中的一段话，哪位大师帮助翻译一下！ d) Check the piston rings for wear or leakage, causing excess blow-by into the gas return. Piping may be such that this excess gas generated cannot escape to the supply tank without causing some back pressure on the liquid suupply. This can starve the pump momentarily. The piston rings should last well in excess of 1.000 hours in normal service. However. Excessive wear or even breakage can occur if the pump is allowed to run extended periods of without sufficient liquid level. 查看更多2个回答 . 5人已关注
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